Tag: christian

I was thinking…

Today I was thinking about the relationship between autoimmune illnesses, chronic pain and bad childhoods.
I grew up in an abusive home. I spent five years in a foster home that was not a good home. I may not have suffered sexual abuse there but it was definitely physically and mentally abusive. After five years, my siblings and I went back to our birth mother only to endure hunger, homelessness, abandonment and for my closest sister and I to be sexually abused.
What I have been wondering is how many people have a chronic illness and have had a bad childhood, abuse, abandonment, feelings of worthlessness, facing unknown days? Even now, I fight off those same feelings that I had as a child. To make matters worse, now I also face debilitating pain and chronic illness that bring up some of the same feelings.
I have to wonder how many others besides me have had a rough start in life only to find themselves with a rough adult life of chronic illness? I would like for others to weigh in and give their opinions and experiences about having a bad childhood and now chronic illnesses. Are they related somehow? Please tell me your stories.
I will be sharing my personal testimony in the coming weeks but I would like to know who else can relate.

Monday morning pick me up.

2 Timothy 3:16-17
“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching,rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”

We have a lot of Christians that are saying the opposite of this scripture. Those people are saying that not all God’s word is God breathed (given by God through inspiration) and basically when the Bible was canonized that the men who agreed on the 66 books did not pick out the right books to be in the Bible. I realize that a lot of the old testament appears to be harsh, but it is still history and history has a way of repeating itself. More-over, we see the character of God in the scriptures and we see how much He loved His people by reading the Bible. Paul tells Timothy in this passage, ALL scripture is given by God through inspiration to man and the scriptures are useful for teaching, discipline, correction and training for the righteous. so, here is my question, if we don’t believe the whole Bible which pages are we going to ignore or rip out of the Bible? I, for one, believe the whole word of God, and the full gospel.


Monday morning pick me up. (No whining!)

Philippians 2: 14-16
“Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.” Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the word of life.”

I have a sign on my refrigerator at home that says, “No Whining.” I’m convinced that people in the world are wanting to hear something different, something refreshing, something other than the same old thing, than they hear every day, whining and complaining. I’m convinced that people want to see someone positive, upbeat, cheerful and friendly. Don’t we hear enough whining and complaining on the news and from the people in the world who have no hope? If you call yourself a child of God, then be a child of God, live as a child of God, act like a child of God, reflect God. But for the Lord’s sake, Don’t whine and complain!


Faith outweighs pain.



God is always near, even if we don’t see it in the moment. I can often look back after I am out of the moment and see God was close by all along. Being chronically ill, or just facing a trying time is probably the hardest time to remember that because you are literally fighting against fleshly pain and faith. For me, I get a reminder everyday that this “chronic” illness isn’t going away.  My faith in God is constantly tested and believe me it’s not easy to stay strong. It’s in these times that I have to dig deep and my faith has to outweigh my pain.

God hasn’t failed me!

I have been diagnosed with Lupus and so many other autoimmune diseases that are rare and hard to make sense of and it seems as if it’s one thing after another. Even though I have gone through a lot of trials in my life and now this disease I know God has never failed me!! He has always showed up in the most profound ways in my life. God has always given me, what I consider miracles and he has never ever left me even in the darkest of days! Just today, I was at the doctor’s office for a simple refill on my medicine for prednisone. I have something called neurocardiogenic syncopede, and my heart was fluttering a lot. I thought I was just having an off day, no big deal. My regular doctor wasn’t in today, but the doctor I did see, asked how I felt,and I told him I was ok but my heart was fluttering some. He decided to do an EKG and the results was that my heart was out of rhythm. He said to me, “I think this was a divine intervention by God,” whoever hears that from their doctor? The doctor sent me to my primary doctor and a plan was made with what to do about my heart rhythm.
Here is my take on the day; I don’t know why I am facing these horrific health problems, but I do know God has always made a way for me even if I didn’t see it in the moment. I trust God. No matter the trials I have in this life, God hasn’t failed me! Satan may be out to destroy my life, that is his job and as long as I am child of God he will continue to try to destroy everything I do. My God is bigger than anything Satan can throw at me.

It’s not always easy to make changes.

Life is always changing and it is not always easy to make those changes. My fourteen year old daughter is graduating from the eighth grade this year. She is having a tough time in this last week of school, realizing that she will be leaving her middle school friends behind and going to the High School of her choice that will not be with her current friends. My daughter was accepted into a program at a high school in another city that will prepare her for her chosen career as a Veterinarian while in high-school. God opened up the door for her and we were so thankful for that but the opportunity is hard for her, she will have make some sacrifices of not going on to high school with her friends in order to prepare herself for her future. I know that the transition is bittersweet for her and at the moment it is not easy to feel torn between staying with her friends and what is going to be the best decision for her future.
I know that she will not regret this decision and it is best for her to keep moving forward but moving forward is how she will grow and achieve her goals. 

My daughter’s situation reminds me of my own walk with God,sometimes the changes in my life have been painful but in the end I have grown so much. Changes can be scary, even for adults we like to stay where we are comfortable and familiar. I have fought change many times in my walk with God, but I must say that if I knew then what I know now, then perhaps I would not have fought so hard to hold on to the same old life that I thought was dear to me. Walking with God change are inevitable, but God will bless abundantly if I keep moving forward. God promises to never leave or forsake us. The best choice I can make is not always the easiest choice but choosing to move forward and trust God is the best way for me to grow.

Monday morning pick me up. ( The secret for happiness and success in life.)

Every morning my Pastor at Grace Fellowship Ministry writes and sends out a personal devotion to each of his members in our church on text. I have asked him to write Monday morning pick me ups for this blog because I know that when Monday comes we all need a little encouragement and he was happy to help me out. I hope you guys enjoy them as much as I do. Please feel free to leave any comment or any questions and I will make sure that they all get to him personally. Happy Monday everyone!!

Joshua 1:8
“Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.”

If I were to tell you that I have the secret for happiness and success in life, what would you think. Skeptical? Don’t be, because it’s true, I have the secret to living an abundant Life. God gave Joshua the inside scoop; Keep God’s word as your foremost guide. Meditate on His word, talk about His word, discuss His word whenever you can.
Here is what I usually get from people, especially Christians; “I don’t understand the Bible.” Really? There are over 450 English translations of the Bible and thousands of commentaries about the Bible and you can’t find one that speaks to you? Listen, if you want to prosper and be successful, go to the promise from God’s own mouth, meditate on His word, it will give you abundant Life.

My God is bigger!!

This morning, I was listening and singing to one of my new favorite songs that I have recently found, “My God is Bigger”, written by Matt Fawcett. The chorus goes like this:

My God is bigger, than the stars in the sky

My God is bigger, than the question why

My God is bigger,than the saltiest sea

My God is big, enough to love me.

As I was singing this song I realized that if I truly believe that God is bigger than anything that I face, then what do I have to worry about?  I have been facing some pretty extensive things with my health and now I am having to take chemo therapy for my Lupus. If that were not enough, I have some extensive things going on with my family. Some days I don’t know what to expect, and I don’t how things are going to work out.  I asked myself this morning, how much more can I take? God told me, it’s not for you to take on anyway, cast your cares on me. So, no matter what I am facing today, or in the coming weeks he can take it on. He is bigger than any problem that I may face, bigger than anything I can imagine in my mind. Today, I am casting all my imaginations down, I’m not going to allow myself to dwell on the negative, the illness, the problems. Since God is bigger, I’m going to give it to God and let go of everything that keeps me from seeing Him move. I am going to choose not to be too anxious or worry about what I can’t change any way. I must trust that he is bigger than all my problems. I know that I am in good hands with my Father God.