Fathers to the Fatherless

Father’s Day didn’t have any meaning to me for most of my life, my biological father was abusive, and it was just a bad reminder of the past, but Father’s Day brings new meaning since I met my spiritual father.

According to the U.S. Census, approximately 15 million people in the U.S are fatherless. My earthly father was not a good father at all. He provided none of the essentials that I needed as a child or even now as an adult. My relationship with my biological father was anything but loving and trusting, and for the first 9 years of my life, it was torture.

After being placed in a foster home for a substantial portion of my childhood even there I did not have a father. At church, I was told that God was my father, but to me that did not equate because of the experiences that I had already had. How could I see God as my Father when when my biological Father caused me so much pain and abuse?

I have always loved God but accepting him as a Father was difficult. I had such a tainted view of what a Father really was, and I couldn’t grasp the magnitude of God’s love for me as Father.

It took the love of a spiritual father to change my mind about what a father was. A spiritual father is a father figure within the Body of Christ.

It was because of his relentless love and acceptance that I could finally see the Heavenly Father in a true light.

Seeing A Loving Father for the First Time

My Spiritual Father

I did not know I needed a Father figure, but God knew I needed a Father figure. It was amazing, God gave me so much more than just a Father, he gave me a Dad. We have a trusting, healthy father/daughter relationship and I thank God every day for that blessing in my life.

I can’t thank him enough for his love, and commitment to me. My Dad corrects me when I am wrong, and he forgives me even when I don’t deserve it. That’s the thing, a real father always forgives, and moves on, just like our Heavenly Father. A Spiritual father will always express and exemplify and knowledge, wisdom, and understanding. A spiritual father will always give sound counsel and pour out blessings. A spiritual father will nurture and protect.He never leaves you even when you have messed up. A spiritual father will use those moments as teaching moments. A spiritual father should always be a representation of the heavenly father.

My Dad has also taught me a few other things, like how a real father is supposed to be.

1. My Father will never leave me.

God promises, “I will never leave you nor forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5).

God is deeply, unshakably committed to you. You never have to ask whether he will stay or leave.

My Dad shows me that a real Father will always be there no matter what. I never have to worry that he will get tired of me one day and be done with me, that’s not how a father/daughter relationship works.

2. The Father knows what I need.

Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.” (Matthew 6:8)

My spiritual father always seems to know what I need spiritual and mentally and offers loving advice with respect to who I am a daughter.

3. The Father takes great delight in his children.

God says, in Isaiah 43:44” you all “his children” are precious in my eyes,”

Without any love or encouragement from my dad, I could easily question whether I was loved at all. I used to constantly battle with how much I was worth.

4. The Father loves Unconditionally

(Romans 5:6–8) He is a hope for the abandoned, a refuge for the fearful, a Father to the fatherless.

Thankfully, our heavenly Father’s love for us is not conditional. He does not love us based on what we do to deserve his love. God loves us just because he loves us. Even when we’re disobedient and rebellious, He loves us.

God reaches out to you in great love even when you are at your worst.

Father’s hold such a vital role in our lives. In a Christian home they are the beginning foundation of what our relationship will look like with our Heavenly Father.

If you don’t have a Father, consider reaching out to someone that has a close relationship with God and accept them as a mentor and if you are approached reciprocate. Maybe you don’t have a father, but you have a person in your life that has made an impact in your life, thank them this year.

Lastly, remember we all have our Father in Heaven. You can’t get any better than that. Make sure you honor him this Sunday and every day after.

Happy Father’s Day!

Rise!

Rise!

What if God wants to use you and what you are going through to reach someone else? What if He wants to heal you so that your story can heal someone else? I know that I often see myself as insignificant but God does not see me that way! He sees me and you differently than how we see ourselves. He sees us stronger than we give ourselves credit for, he sees us as victorious, significant, and he wants for us to live the abundant life that he prepared for us before we were even born.

We were made to RISE above! Whatever you are facing today, it does not define who you are. Maybe you have an illness, depression, addiction, abuse, anxiety, or past regrets, whatever it is God has a plan. Be still and you will find it.

 

I beat the odds.

 

The odds have been against me for most of my life

From the very start, I was born into a dysfunctional family, born to parents that couldn’t take care of themselves let alone children. Parents that were mentally unstable, a result of their own dysfunctional past. I lived through all kinds of abuse for the first nine years of my life from the people who I should have trusted first. Then, the next eight years I experienced a greater hell than the first nine. The scars from those abuses have haunted me for years.

 

               Child abuse takes its toll on the body.

I believe the body, mind and spirit pays for the past abuse in ways I never imagined. Now, I see that the odds were stacked against me because now I live with a disease that has ravaged my body on the inside. I suffer with mixed connective tissue disorder, an autoimmune disease that manifests itself in many different forms that attack you from the inside, and Lupus, and major stomach and esophagus issues. Although my illness isn’t always apparent on the outside, it is creating havoc inside my body.      

                          I’m an Over comer.

The odds have been against me so many times,  but I am a fighter, and a survivor not a victim. Every single day of my life, I wake up knowing that today is brand new day and no matter what I might have felt like yesterday, it doesn’t have any bearing on how I will feel today.  I mentally fight against my past and my illness every day, after all I believe that healing begins in my spirit, then in my mind, lastly in my body. I mentally decide how much I will allow the things that come at me each day control me.

                   God has a purpose for my life. 

No matter the terrible things that have come my way, I choose to put myself out there in the world, to people I may never meet, hoping that I will give someone enough hope and strength to hang on for a little while longer. My quest and my goal is to touch someone for Jesus. He is my strength and a very present help in time of trouble. (Psalms 46: 1).

 #survivor #purpose # chronicillness

Suffering doesn’t always have to mean hopeless.

When you are suffering it’s easy to slip into a state of hopelessness.

I live with chronic illness, my major organs are being attacked one of them is my heart, that means unless God heals me, I am not going to get any better. That also means, each day I have to be at peace with where I am at today, at this very moment. You can be angry about the past or your present right now, that’s entirely up to you. I tend not to give the power back over to the people or my illness that have already ruined things once.


The way I see it is; that I can live life one of two ways;


One; I was born into an unfair world, I suffered and I didn’t deserve how I got treated. I get knocked down too much and I don’t think life is fair so I am not going to even try. Life just sucks…

Two; I can use my circumstances and become stronger because of them. Every time life knocks me down, I get back up again using it as a spring-board. I focus on the good things in life and enjoy every moment in life that I do have.

I choose to live my life exactly like the second choice. I have no time for negativity in my mind because my time is so precious and limited.

I refuse to allow myself to think about how unfair my illness is.  I know the consequences in the end, but I do not dwell on them. I am making my life worthwhile anyway though, no matter the trials. 

Make your life count for something no matter what is going on in your life. If you are sick, count your blessings still.

I would rather live out the rest of my days being grateful for all the things I  do have, rather than be upset, live in regret, waste precious time, for the things I didn’t do or don’t have.

Day 3…How does Auto immune affect our family.

This is my best friend and her perspective. When you have chronic illness, it’s hard to keep friends close because you constantly have to cancel plans and she does get that from me. I have tried my best to educate everyone in my life what Lupus is. I believe that has helped my relationships.



I have known Tabitha most of my life and she is one of the strongest people that I know. She can handle just about anything that is thrown her way. When she told me she was diagnosed with Lupus, I had no idea what that really meant. It took some learning on my part to understand how this can really impact a
person’s life and change everything that they know. As I said before, Tabitha is one of the strongest people I know, if not the strongest. I am always worrying about her even when I don’t say it; that is just who I am as a person. When I do ask how she is, she quickly tries to comfort me with a “I’m fine”, “things
are great”, but I can see hurt in her eyes, or hear the pain in her voice that is caused by this disease. I wish that everyday I could make the pain go away or make it my own, that way she would no longer suffer. I worry for her family too and wish they could have their mom back in full health that she use to be. She is loved beyond words and there is nothing I wouldn’t do for her, even write this up with

the little sleep I have had, working over 12 hours a day, going out 10 days straight. I Love you Tabitha.



In case you missed it….

Living with many Autoimmune Diseases is difficult enough. I have to keep on living a life, being a mother and a wife. I have to deal with my pain and I have to keep a handle on my emotions.


Over the next few days I will share some of my closest family and friends writings on how my illness affects them. I asked each of them to write how my illness affects them. The first one will be from my Father, the second one will be from my 14 year old daughter and I will continue for a few days with a few more people. 

The reason I am doing this is because I want to bring awareness that our families and friends are deeply affected.



When we are physically  hurting, they are emotionally hurting for us. Sometimes it’s hard to express that you love someone when it hurts so bad.

See previous post for letters from other family.

Let me let you in on the seriousness of my Autoimmune Disease story. Let’s get real for a minute.

 Let’s get real for a minute. 

I think at times I downplay the seriousness of my autoimmune diseases and I don’t allow others in on the reality of my story. 

My major organs are being attacked. I have heart blockages in my right bundle branch and I have the beginnings of kidney issues due to lupus. My digestive system doesn’t work as at it should, for my digestive system to break down foods it takes three times as long as a normal system.



I have over ten autoimmune diseases all of them have symptoms of their own. Lupus, Mixed Connective Tissue Disease, Lupus Nuephritis, Gastroparesis Nuerocardiogenic syncope,Sjogens, Autonomic dysfuction, Esophageal dysfuction, Arthritis, Antiphospholipid Syndrome, Autoimmune dysautonomia, Raynaud’s phenomenon, Myositis, chronic pain syndrome, and fibromyalgia. I am sure I have forgotten to list something because I also suffer from short term memory loss. 



 

I have to take a hand full of medication in the morning and at night, where before I became sick getting me to take Tylenol was difficult. 
I am on a healthy eating plan because I have serious digestive issues. I eat soft foods, I do not eat much more than a cup full of food at a meal. I do not eat sugar, processed foods, fried foods, gluten or bread. 
I have people advising me continuously about special diets, gluten free diets, vitamin rich diets and more as if these would cure things in an instant. I have a list of foods that my doctors tell me I cannot eat but I continue to fight every single day to stay alive and to stay healthy.
I just turned 39 years old on Friday and I plan on spreading awareness of the horrible autoimmune diseases that attack millions of people so that one day there might be a cure. 
My desire is to make the public aware of autoimmune disease and to reach as many people as I can for Jesus Christ. God has given me peace about what is happening in my body and I want everyone else to find peace as well. I remain positive because the only one that can heal me is God. He is all I have.